"I want to stay here and hang out with my friends..."

Home, for Alan, has always been the light at the end of the tunnel every week. He could come home, eat with us, watch tv in his room, visit extended family. Since his placement in the waiver apartments, we have been encouraging him to participate in activities with his peers. We have a monthly activity schedule and go over it every week to see if there is something he is interested in. It has always seemed that he felt that this was some sort of punishment.

This Thursday morning, at 5:10 am, Alan called. "Hey Mom," he said breathlessly, "I don't want to come home this weekend, I don't want to do that. I want to stay here and hang out with my friends. And I need $20 for our trip on Sunday. When will you be bringing that?"

I was surprised. I told him it was fine for him to stay there, and that I would bring the money after work.

When I arrived at his apartment, he was putting his clean clothes away, having finished his laundry. His waiver staff told me he has been passing his room check every week. His room was spotless, bed made, and he was clean and looked great.

I'm loving this new twist. I am sure we will have more lows and more highs, but this is something I will treasure forever.

"I want to stay here and hang out with my friends." I've been waiting a long time to hear that.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day by Day

Alan is doing better since his hospitalization.  His outbursts are fewer, and are less "pitched" than before his med changes.  The staff assigned to him at his group home are doing well with him.  They have to pick their battles, as we all do, and are trying to keep him to a schedule. We took Alan to his neurology appointment this week.  Usually when someone asks Alan how he is doing, he just says "fine," but on this day he answered, "My knees are weak, and I have to lean over and hold on to things." After examination, Alan's doctor recommended physical therapy, as Alan is perilously close to falling.  While we don't know if Alan will be able to follow a therapists directions, or will even want to cooperate, we will arrange for a consultation. I can deal with the nuts and bolts of being an advocate and sometimes caregiver for my son, but I find it hard to maintain the focus I need when I hear his say that he is having trouble walking.  It is
Read more

Our Sweet Beloved Son

Image
Lacy Alan Goff passed away into the arms of Jesus early in the morning of May 28, 2016.  We were called to the nursing home about 1:30 am. God has shown His mercy.  Lacy was still himself most of the time. He was mostly happy and always had a smile on his face.  We do not have to watch the slow decline of HD rob him of what was left of himself. We have been privileged to be Lacy's parents for 35 years.  He has been a joy in our lives and hearts.  We had such hard times, but Lacy never failed to try his hardest.  He was a worshipper of the Lord Jesus and a man of faith.  He slipped into heaven in his sleep.  What a joyous homecoming party in heaven! "Soady Pops" for everyone!! Now it is left to us to plan our goodbye and to keep walking our own road of faith knowing that our sweet beloved son is in the arms of our Lord and Savior. My last words to him yesterday afternoon were "I love you."  He smiled at me.  I hugged him.  On the way home, a scripture sud
Read more

Grief and Hope

When we visited with our pastor in preparation for Lacy's service, he reminded us of the scripture in I Thessalonians 4:13   But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about those who have died, so that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope ... Knowing where Lacy is, that he is safe and finally free of all his burdens, does not assuage the pain of loss.  We are grieving - sometimes with tears, sometimes with a swift intake of breath - and the grief is oppressive.  I don't want anyone to have the idea that our faith that gives us the hope of eternal life somehow makes us immune to grief.  On the contrary, we are able to express our pain because we know where our son is right now.  We are mourning the loss of his presence in our lives, and the loss of daily contact with the son we loved with all our hearts.   There are no words to express this grief.  My body has seemed to shut down, as though I have been under anesthesia.  I cannot keep a tho
Read more