One Foot In Front of the Other

There is a profane meme going around Facebook referencing Robert Frost's "The Road Less Traveled."  The gist of the thought is that sometimes, taking the road less traveled leads the traveler to a confusing place.  We are in that kind of place now. Lacy is falling much more lately.  I understood that falls would become more frequent, but experiencing these falls is much different than knowing they will occur.  He's lost so much control over his body that when he gets off balance he just falls over.  He most often ends up hitting his head. Yesterday afternoon, we were in the emergency room again for the second time this week.  Lacy's face and head is scraped and cut on both sides now.  He looks like he's been beaten.  Yet he has such a great attitude and continues to tell us how tough he is.  He is tough, but we don't feel as resilient.  This is not where we want to be.  The increased falls are taking a toll on his caregivers, to...

Most mornings, I spend some time reading from the Book of Common Prayer.  I try to find one scripture that stands out to me, a timely word that gives me something to think about during the day. This morning, that verse was in Psalms:   "Offer to God a sacrifice of thanksgiving..."   (Psalms 50:14a) When is thanksgiving a sacrifice?  The Psalm goes on to say, "perform your vows to the Most High, and call upon me in the day of trouble..." (v.14b, 15a) It is when a person is in trouble that thanksgiving is a sacrifice.  Lacy was in the hospital ten years ago, gravely ill with pneumonia.  We were allowed in to see him twice a day; one hour in the morning, one in the evening.  I often stood in his hospital room with the sound of the ventilator filling the silence, looking out the window, and offering thanksgiving; Thank you, God for the sunshine.  Thank you for the doctors and nurses.  Thank you for the courage to get up in the morning. ...

Our little family has been experiencing pain and suffering these last few day.  Another fall and a trip to the ER has made it clear that changes in Lacy's care need to be made now.  We are planning for the short run, but are now looking for a nursing home and thinking this next step is not far away.  Big changes are coming. There is an urgency about our situation.  I can't explain it, but there is a sense that time is short.  We have to be prepared for what will come, heeding that still, small voice that urges us onward.  So we are making plans. Lacy has lost so much in the last few months.  He can barely walk now, and we are transitioning him to a wheelchair.  It's the yellow model he ordered about a year ago.  Kenny and I feel a sense of relief that he is now forced to use the chair much more.  The walker is just too unreliable. I've always found inspiration and comfort in the written word.  I often memorize poems or Psalms ...